The Wardrobe Project :: Still Got Game

I haven't been on top of my game lately. I can admit it. Lack of sleep, lots of travel... it's just harder to put shit together. But this week, friends, oh this week, I dressed like a champ. Evidence below.

Old Navy cardigan, Old Navy blouse, Seven jeans, Gap flats

I realize as I'm posting, there's a ton of Old Navy clothes this week. Old Navy is great. They are also awful. They have a lot of crap - stuff that looks cheap, fits poorly, wears out fast or has old lady prints. But if you're not an idiot, you can find great stuff there. Also, Old Navy is cheap. I don't care how I rich I get (probably not very rich), I'll still get my green skinny jeans at Old Navy. I forget how much I love that place. I should go this weekend.

Old Navy blouse, Seven jeans, Marshall's wedges, vintage necklace, Forever 21 ring

Old Navy dress, Steve Madden boots, Forever 21 necklace,  Oscar Meyer turkey bacon (yum!)

 BCBG sweater, Citizen jeans, Banana bracelet, j.crew flats

I'm convinced I don't actually have thick legs in person, just in pictures of me in white skinnies. Do not disabuse me of this notion.

Old Navy chambray, Gap skinnies, Target flats, street vendor bracelet

The Wardrobe Project :: Traveling

I've been in and out of LA for work the past couple of weeks. It is very hard to remember to take a photo before a 7 am flight or in a hotel room. This is the best I could do. You're welcome.

Banana Republic dress / American Eagle flops

Seven jeans / Forever 21 sweater / Old Navy ruffle tank / Banana flops

Seven jeans / Target sandals / HM blouse

HM pants / BCBG blouse / HM purse / Target patent pumps

Target skinnies / Old Navy tank / Banana flops

HM sweater / Marshalls blouse / Guess jeans / American Eagle flops / Charming Charlie weekender

Gap shirt / j.crew linen shorts / Banana flops

Seven skinnies / Banana flops / Forever crystal necklace / Marhsall's top

Old Navy dress / HM sweater / Banana flops / Banana necklace

Old Navy top / j.crew shorts / Gap belt

Marshall's top / Seven jeans / Forever bracelet

Citizen jeans / j.crew tank /HM sweater / Forever necklace

The Wardrobe Project :: Lazy

I'm not trying very hard lately. And that's okay. My friends, families and lovers all still seem to like me just as much. I'll get my shit together. It's just so easy, when it warms up, to want to wear flip flops with everything again.

Forever 21 blazer / Seven jeans / Steve Madden snake pumps / j.crew lace tank / vintage necklace

Why am I sideways here? I dunno. I was feeling wide in the frontal shots. Sometimes you just feel wide.

 

Gap chambray / Gap maxi skirt / Cost Plus necklace

 HM denim jacket / Gap silk shell / Gap 1969 skinnies / Aerosoles tan leather wedges / HM necklace

 Seven jeans / Old Navy tank / Francesca's blouse / Steve Madden faux snake pumps

Cynthia Rowley knit dress / HM cardigan / Banana Republic flops / Goody bracelet

Yeah, that's a hair rubber band that I'm calling a bracelet. Sure, that's stupid, but you do the same damn thing.

DIY on the Side

I've been busy being fabulous and shit. And when the happens, the DIY projects get tabled. That's actually a good pun. You'll understand it in a minute.

I have had this perfectly nice little side table for a while. It looked like a Target clearance side table though. And was almost unnoticeable next to the white sofa. In fact, it looked like the books and lamp were just floating in space. Guests marveled at my magic floating lamp. They said, "Nice floating lamp!"

So I went to Lowe's, bought a $2 can of black spray paint, strapped on my mask and goggles and got to work. This is not a real DIY project. But I think it makes a big difference.

I've liked the way I'd done the living room for a while and just wanted to change something for shits and giggles. Do you ever feel like you just want change in your decor for no good reason at all?

I also found some time to make these tasty mini cheesecakes. But no time to take decent pics of them. I was too busy shoving them into my face.

These are pretty easy. Fill some phyllo shells from the freezer section with cheesecake batter (eggs, cream cheese, vanilla and sugar) then top them with whatever you have. I had honey and pistachios, blueberries and sugar and some chocolate with Dos-i-do Girl Scout cookies.  

I had some leftover batter, so I crushed up the cookies for a crust and made a few ugly ones. Using cupcake liners, they aren't so pretty, but I solved that by topping them with a half a cookie as a distraction.


All in all, small projects can be just as satisfying as big ones. They're not Martha-level DIYs, but Martha can fuck herself.

The Wardrobe Project :: Spring Has Sprung

We hit 90 degrees this week. I'm not trying to rub it in, but yes, I'm trying to rub it in.

Old Navy dress / Steve Madden boots / Target lucite necklace

I wore leggings as pants this week. Sorry. And also, this is a disaster. Sorry again.

HM Sweater / Old Navy top / HM leggings / Steve Madden boots 

Old Navy top / Seven jeans

What's the weird bulge in my right hip pocket? Who knows. It's a Lois & Clarkie mystery.

Gap dress / HM jacket / American Eagle flops / HM necklace

A decent wine tasting/meet-the-parents outfit, yeah?

Marshalls top / Gap skinnies / HM purse / Target sandals

The added benefit of taking pictures of your outfit every day is that you also take pictures of your hips every day. And your waist. And your chins. And while I'm not that tough on myself (I'm pretty awesome at any size), it's helped me notice I'm packing on a few pounds. That's because I'm not working out enough and eating too much. Obviously. But if I'm going to outlive all my enemies and dance on their graves, I need to take better care of myself. 

I'm doing a friendly weight loss contest with some peeps at work. Cash is on the line. Wish me luck.

The Wardrobe Project :: SXSW

I went to Austin for SXSWi and it was a sh!t show. Too many people. Rain. Newbie problems. I'm sure everyone would tell you it was cool before every schmuck had to come and ruin it. And I'm that schmuck, I realize. I'm sorry. 

I did see sessions with Al Gore, Cory Booker, Elon Musk (founder of Tesla/PayPal/SpaceX), Andy Cohen, W. Kamau Bell and a bunch of other random folks. Al Gore has lost none of his passion or wit. Andy Cohen was late. Elon Musk is possibly a crappy father. And a bunch of other people were interesting and funny.

We tried our first phone stack. I insisted on this. All the tech geeks on their devices were not talking to each other. How often do this many smart, entrepreneurial, creative folks get together en masse? They should talk to each other.

Have you done this? The first person to grab their phone pays the bill. This was at Frank. If you are in Austin, go to there. Get the bacon infused vodka.

On to the outfits. I packed a bunch of shorts, but at the last minute glanced at the weather and threw in some jeans. That was smart. It was cold and wet.

These are in no particular order.

Seven skinnies / Target pink skinnies / Guess bootcuts / HM sweaters / Gap chambray 

 Target jacket / Marshalls tees / Banana black flops / American Eagle medallion flops

Franco Sarto crossbody bag / Charming Charlie elephants scarf / Old Navy striped tank

Welcome Home Baby

When my good friends had a baby, I wondered if people still put those big storks in front yards any more. And since my friends were so far from family, I knew it was on me to not screw this up. You only bring your first child home once. And if there's supposed to be a stork to make it special, I better find out and get a stork.

Pinterest failed me. Big time. But one of my favorite blogs had a fun picture of a welcome home decoration for a newly married couple.

Side note to marrieds. After the honeymoon, you're not special. I'm not doing this for you. It's back to being about the rest of us again. If you have a baby or are a baby or go to Iraq or have your lady bits removed or something, I'll consider it.

I put together a "Welcome Home" bunting for the little guy. I used more sturdy materials than the one I found online because (1) I had them already and (2) I wanted it to withstand any gusts of wind, sprinklers or dogs. I'd hate to have them come home to a pile of wet crepe paper stuck to the door.

"Welcome home. I hope your baby doesn't need feeding or changing, because you need to clean up this mess I made for you!"

I wrote the kid's name on the bunting in real life, I just removed it here so you don't kidnap him or whatever. Everyone knows all you need is a kid's name and you can get him into your van.

You can make this. I promise. The imperfections are the charm.
1. Slice some strips of burlap and tie knots every foot. This creates bulk.
2. Stitched some fabric circles onto a thin ribbon. This adds pattern.
3. Tear strips of contrasting fabric and slice it up like fringe. This adds texture.
4. Cut some triangles, fold the tops over, sew or glue them down.
5. String them and write your message. Consider personalizing if you think they'll keep it. Consider it just saying "baby" if you think pedophiles live in their neighborhood.
6. Use string to tie it together in the spots you will tack to the door frame. Make sure to have some swag.

That last bit is just plain good life advice. Always be sure to have some swag.